July 2017 - Light Needs Dark

You know, every time I learn a heartbreaking lesson, I realize that life is really all about how you look at things, and the universe will mirror your beliefs. Money is a wonderful example of this.

Money is like a very successful and busy friend to me. I know she has a big heart and I know she really loves me, but sometimes I feel like she abandons me. Not because she means to, but because she has so many other things to do.

I’ll invite Money to go out for drinks at nine, and she won’t show up to the bar until eleven. I’ll send her several text messages that she won’t respond to, making me panic and seethe; and then, just as I’m about to get up and walk out, she’ll show up. She’ll flash me that beautiful smile of hers as she walks in with a bag from Barney’s or a box from Tiffany’s that has just what I wanted in it. Continue reading “Money, Debt and I Have a Very Interesting Relationship”

The need to be in control is directly linked to the need to not be your true self, and here’s why.

So lately, I’ve been paying very close attention to how much I’ve needed to control my hair. It’s no secret that Black women have a very complex relationship with their hair.

But I never fully understood why I struggled so much with mine and why there was always shame attached to my hair. I used to think that it was because of the weaves, the perms, and the heat, or maybe it was the media, or the shady comments from friends and family.

But now, I think it was something else. I think it was because no one ever told me that my hair was something to be proud of. I had no idea that it was alive, and that it was a procreation of me like a child. Continue reading “Do You Really Need to be in Control?”