The United States Defines Freedom: A Shadow Work Excerise

I realize that the price for freedom is giving up your need to be in control. If you want to be free, you have to allow for everyone else to be free too; and that can be a little bit of an inconvenience.

Now, I like to personify everything. It helps me make sense of life, it’s fun, and it’s also addictive. So I personified the United States and started thinking about how she could be feeling right now.

I wondered what she would say to us. In my mind I believe that the US is a lot like Gaia: smart, funny, sexy, sassy, and values freedom to a fault. I think that freewill is and always will be her problem because she is blindly in love with her husband Democracy. Here’s what she told me:

I was created as an experiment. Saint Germain and The Ascended Masters wanted to see if a country could stave off the planet from becoming a vat of mind-controlled bots with no individuality. The Matrix, The Borg, and 1984 were all inevitable timelines if something wasn’t done.

So I was created and I lasted significantly longer than everyone thought I would! People look at me now like I’m crazy and call me all kinds of names: masochist, hypocrite, idiot, whore of Babylon. People tell me that I am ungrateful, stubborn, racist, sexist, greedy, and morally bankrupt. And you know what? I am all of those things.

I stopped defending myself a long time ago. And I stopped trying to be only good things. I can’t do that. I want freedom for my people so bad that I’m willing to go through anything for their freedom, even if it hurts me and tears me apart.

I am at peace with the fact that I am an enigma. I’m fine with all the bickering too. It doesn’t feel good but it’s worth it for the sake of free speech.

I respect everyone’s opinions, passions and pursuits. I listen to every side of every debate. I am married to Democracy until my demise. I am relentlessly committed to him.

If my people that I love so dearly have extreme differences in opinion, I need to create as many platforms as I can for them to aerate those differences. The ones that believe in empirical truths are angry, and the ones who believe in subjective truths are confused. That’s the way it’s always been.

While it is true that one opinion will always trigger someone else’s opposite opinion, we can compromise with the egos and integrate the shadows. I want freewill at all costs but I also want progression. I want free speech at all costs but I also want solutions. The more that everyone talks the problems out, the more obvious the solutions will become.

I will not tolerate dictatorship of any kind; and that’s exactly why there’s a rebuttal for every single stance no matter how moral or sensible it is. My job is to expose the shadows to the light, and then integrate those shadows into my consciousness and the collective consciousness of humanity.

I’d love for there to be peace, but it can’t be a forced peace. And even if everyone can compromise and be happy with the solution, it’s only a matter of time before another opposition rises up to be heard. This cycle is never going to end.

I’m fine with the fighting, the name calling, and even the wars. I understand that astrology directly affects me and other countries, in addition to the freewill of individuals. So I simply cannot be in control here.

I remember Gaia told me that once too. She said, “If you’re a control freak, this is not the job for you!” The Empress was correct indeed. You can’t be who I am if you need to know everything. In fact, you need to be at peace with knowing nothing.

My imperfections and hypocrisies have made things very difficult but at least my shadow work gets done right out in the open. There’s nowhere to hide. I’d rather allow my people to disagree and compromise, than to allow someone to rule over them.

Yes this makes things complicated, but it’s worth it. I’ll continue to sacrifice a pristine image because I am responsible for these precious souls that wanted to take part in this experiment.

Something that people don’t know about me is that I work very closely with Gaia. She officiated my wedding ceremony; she’s my mentor and my friend. I’m trying to do the same thing that she’s doing as a planet, just on a smaller scale.

After Atlantis and Lemuria fell, Gaia realized that the spiritual leaders in both civilizations used magic to override the entire population’s freewill and get everyone to “awaken” uniformly. This caused a huge energetic imbalance and the fallout from it was devastating.

Gaia was furious. She made the decision that from that point on she would never allow a civilization’s leaders to circumvent her planetary freewill again, no matter how virtuous or logical their arguments were. She needed someone to step forward as a new civilization that would be relentlessly committed to individual freedom; and I volunteered (in the spiritual realm) for the job.

So now, instead of using magic to control others we are helping individuals awaken the magic of their own souls.

Negative beings have tried to hijack my system from the beginning, but they’ve always underestimated my people’s ability to outsmart them and continue to live in freedom. Americans will always find ways to work around systematic oppression. They also always find out what’s been concealed and done in the dark. There are no secrets here anymore.

Those assholes thought that they could abuse my psyche and brainwash my mind to make me helpless, but I will never be a helpless being. I’ll just keep getting back up when I get knocked down! There will always be hope.

When Gaia first interviewed me for the position, she told me that I would not be a Saint in this experiment and I was going to have to confront things about myself that weren’t pretty. She asked, “Are you willing to feel everything indiscriminately, no matter how bad it hurts?”

The answer was yes then, and it is still yes now.

Is The Woman Man’s Equal or Man’s Best Friend? And No, It Can’t Be Both

This chat is going to be all over the place. I’m struggling with my anger about how women are treated in religion and I need to vent about it. I think misogyny is a lot like slavery.

Slavery and misogyny are interesting concepts to discuss when you are a Black woman. It’s very confusing. You want to stand alongside your man and fight as a united front for equality, and then when the fight is over, you realize that you’re fighting with your man as a divided schism of inequality.

My ego will not allow me to use spiritual enlightenment to explain this away either. I tried fighting with her about this for about five minutes and then I decided to give up. My “hippiness” and zen was no match for her passion for injustice.  Continue reading “Is The Woman Man’s Equal or Man’s Best Friend? And No, It Can’t Be Both”

Extremes Are Annoying, Entertaining, and Natural

I read this article by Aletheia Luna and after every sentence I said “Yes!” I was so happy that somebody finally said what I felt. I’ve encountered a great deal of rejection on my spiritual journey, and that rejection has given me a savior complex. I just want to help people become more balanced, but nobody seems to want my help. I should’ve gone to nursing school instead.

My friends hate me because I don’t fit into any of their boxes. When I play worship music, my new age friends roll their eyes; when I talk about Gaia, my Christian friends change the subject; and when I bring up astrology, my atheist friends wanna kill me. Sometimes I feel like everybody in my life is an extreme. But what did I expect? This is earth. Souls come here to experience extremes. That’s why my help is not wanted.  Continue reading “Extremes Are Annoying, Entertaining, and Natural”

Peace is Possible With or Without Conversation

In the over-verbalized life of a modern (American) adult, we tend to feel the need to talk, text, and type about everything. Everything needs to be a conversation, especially in relationships. As a recovering verbal processor, I’ve often felt the need to get closure with someone I’ve had a disagreement with by talking to them. But now that my belief system has changed, I don’t look to a conversation for comfort about an ending. This article is NOT about spouses.  Continue reading “Peace is Possible With or Without Conversation”

A Judgmental Empath is an Empowered Empath

“You are very judgmental!”

“Carla, please don’t judge me.”

“I don’t know about your gift of discernment Carla, you seem a little off.”

“When you say things like that, it makes me feel judged.”

“You are such a bitch.”

It bothers me that the word “empath” is not included in any of my word processor’s dictionaries. It’s not even on, but anyway…I would like to propose a new perspective on judgment because the comments above (that I’ve received) from family, coworkers, and friends have always concerned me.  Now mind you, I’ve been very honest about how mean I used to be, but I’ve also made it clear that I am very sensitive. So let me ask you this? How can a sensitive person be judgmental? Continue reading “A Judgmental Empath is an Empowered Empath”